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advise to brides

You are getting married! Can you afford that dream wedding??
Yes! You can I would love to show you how.
The First thing, you need to set down and talk to everyone who wants to be a part of the wedding.  Start delicate conversations about money,size of guest list,wedding date, time, decide how expenses will be shared, found out who will help pay for what.  Set a tentative budget.  Many wedding involve special situations.  In cases where there has been a death or divorce in the family, and subsequent remarriage, there can be extra in-laws, grandparents and other family member who would like to take part in the wedding activities.  There is no set rule on how to handle situations such as this as some families get along better than others.  Individual circumstances can vary a great deal.  Common sense, tact and diplomacy are needed.  Consulting your clergyman may helped.  It's hard being parent.  It's twice as hard being a step parent. I have always though there should be a special place in heaven for them.  No matter how much they do it's not enough.  Eight out of ten brides that I work with have step parents.  They are faced with the problem of how to treat that part of the family.. It's not an easy time in some ways. Many couples are torn between asserting their own ideas and beliefs, and dealing with the customs and traditions their families with them to follow.  Only when everyone is willing compromise and be understanding, can these problems be resolved.  So many times young women come in who have step-patents and who don't want the "real" parent to have anything to do with the wedding.  Something that happened in the past, or something they didn't understand has hurt them.  I tell them,. to remember this it a time for feelings, and , for love, and yes forgiving.  Advise to brides: Getting everyone to get a long will makes your budge better.  Planning a medium to large wedding can be like running a corporation.  You have to know a little bit about a lot of different things in order to make decisions.  You must hire people to provide services for you, budget, and coordinate the whole thing without letting the little details get away from you.  This takes leg work and time.  Delegate the work assign you step parent a special job  This will give the step-parent a feeling of belonging and being a part of your family.  There is plenty of work to go around, and giving your step parent a a job to do will give you more time for the important details that will make your wedding personalize and so very special.  That's what it's about - love.  Use tact and diplomacy in dealing with each parent to avoid hurt feelings that could tale a long time to heal.
But you say, "Linda, What about me?" You need a budge, you need help paying fro the wedding.  You'll find that if you give a little, you'll receive twice as much back.  A parent or step parent want to fell wanted and love.  They give you the world if they could.
Advise to step-parents: Step parents have a very difficult job, and they are seldom appreciated as much as they should be.  If you have accepted this difficult role, try to keep you expectations light, and your sense of humor ready at all time.
  • Don't try to compete with the children's natural parents
  • Remember this is the brides and grooms day
  • Be there for them
  • Think of their feelings first
  • Be their friend, ready to help without questioning why
  • Remember you are loved by their parent that you are married to.
  • Remember this is hard for the real parent too.  Memories of the past will come forth be ready to smile and know you are loved
A young woman came in to discuss arranging her wedding.  When we came to the discussion of her flowers, I asked,"how many fathers?""One, no two, but I don't claim my real father.  He's not walking me down the aisle.  He was never a father to me when  was growing up, and now he thinks he my father.  My step father is walking me down the aisle." she said. Seeing hurt and tears in her eyes, made my heart go out to her. "Honey," I said.  "Please don't do that to your father.   You really could hurt him (This is the other side of the coin the real parent getting hurt.) Brides, think before you decide.  This is the only special time you'll walk down the aisle.  It's a father's dream to give his daughter to the man of her dreams.  This a dream since you were born.  Don't take that away. things we do affect a lot of people of the past and the future.  Your wedding could be the bridge between hurt feelings of the past and forgiving of the future.  Your folks actions has nothing to do with you.  What was done can't be undone, forging is the only way to move forward.TALK...Tell your parents what you feel and why.  Fathers and Mothers, talk to your kids.  This is a good time to explain the past, a time to tell your children why you did what you did.  Time to let the past go.  If you could talk to one another, then you'll all be winners.  The old human emotions when hurt --hurt back and no one wins. That is why you need to talk. Money can ruin relationship family and friends.  If you need for groomsmen and bridesmaid to pay for their attire be up front with them. While it is a honor  to be selected, keep in mind that it
takes a tremendous amount of effort, and money on their end. Let them know what you expect from them when you ask them to be in the wedding. This way if they can not afford it they can tell you than.  This will save hard feelings.
We can help on any budget..At Tomorrow's Memories Bridal Shop you have choices You can rent or buy..
We have a payment plan with no interest.  You put a little money down and make monthly payments until your wedding.  Remember Talking helps....
May Gods' love embraces you as you go through lifes' journey
Linda
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2 Comments to advise to brides:

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Indian Share Market Tips on Thursday, October 08, 2015 4:48 AM
A young woman came in to discuss arranging her wedding. When we came to the discussion of her flowers, I asked,"how many fathers?".......Your writing has impressed me. It’s simple, clear and precise. I will definitely recommend you to my friends and family. Regards and good luck......
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join the coin on Saturday, August 27, 2016 10:08 PM
Wonderful post.Thanks for sharing this message.Keep it up.....
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